Tuesday, 3 March 2009
Marriage - the key to finding happiness?
« Organizing your finances – getting motivated | Main | Online collaboration means a great deal to charities »I went to an amazing wedding at the weekend. The ceremony took place under an ancient oak tree and the symbolic significance was portrayed in a very touching way - not laboured at all. Everyone 'got it' easily enough. The bride has a young son (6 years old) from a former relationship and the groom has been a terrific influence on him over the last few years. Their vows were so heartfelt and the gathering of friends (40% of them from interestate or overseas) were all feeling the love. The reception was a stand up affair in one of melbourne's lesser known nighclubs in a trendy part of town. The word 'nightclub' doesn't do it justice because it had a sophisticated burlesque feel to it, rich satin fabrics, dark hardwood fixtures and awesome cocktails! The speaches were all fantastic and kept to a good length and the atmosphere was just so relaxed and warm.
Several people noted that as the married couple, it's only at a wedding where one can truly enjoy the company of all your closest friends and family. The only comparison is one's funeral! And there, you don't actually get to mix with your guests!
Conclusion? Having great friends makes for a great wedding! But what's the lasting effect the next day?
Weddings are often happy events - 'the happiest day of one's life' it is often said. The marriage itself is obviously more important and it's very hard to see the beautiful and generous couple we saw enjoying anything less than bliss for the rest of their lives. The celebrant did talk about the inevitable challenges ahead as people change and the relationship changes. The key, it was proposed, rests in two things:
- the commitment to always keep trying with the utmost determination
- the bravery to keep communicating with utmost honesty
There's an inter-relationship between cause and effect when you think about marriage and happiness. What happens if you don't feel happy anymore in your marriage? Is it you changing, your partner or your relationship. Someone recently described a marriage/relationship to me in terms of it being an entity that itself required nurturing. What have you done recently to nurture your relationship in an unconditional way?
Honesty and determination - the key to happiness...maybe! Sounds like hard work though! What happened to 'love'? I think love is your motivation. Arguably the best motivation there is.
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